Prone to wander, Lord I feel it

I’m so bad at updating this.. and now it will take so long for people to comment, which gives me even less desire to post again. Oh well, here goes.

Two years ago, I did a summer internship with my Church. Youth ministry. I have since concluded it’s not really what I’m gifted in. That summer, I thought a lot about perseverance, haha.

But actually, that summer I thought a lot about perseverance. I was getting pretty tired. Prayer, evangelism, teaching, reading, loving, not getting the results you want, not getting the kind of rewards you want. These things can wear you down.

"fight the good fight, holding on to faith and a good conscience. Some have rejected these and so have shipwrecked their faith" (1 Tim 1:18-19).

I’m almost 21 years old now. If I live the average life span of a Canadian male, I’ve got 51 years left. Will I still wanna fight in 51 years? I don’t know if I’ll still have the desire to fight in twenty.

"Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling.." (Jude 1:24)

Can He really? I don’t know how many of you follow the things that go on in Evangelicalism, but recently Pastor Ted Haggard (a third-wave Charismatic, very influential according to Time Magazine) admitted to sexual immorality, specifically an affair with a homosexual.

Thankfully, he has been dismissed from his church and from the National Association of Evangelicals, which he was the president of, and is now being more honest about his situation. However, he has really really disqualified himself from future service as a pastor.

I have heard stories like this before, including recently hearing that a megachurch in Texas also had their senior pastor resign because of an extra-marital affair. How do these things happen? What happened to keeping people from stumbling?

I don’t really struggle with doing meth and/or gay sex. In fact, maybe this is a little presumptuous, but I feel almost guaranteed that that will never happen to me. But, I know there is one possible sin or two or twelve that could sideline me from ministry real quick.

That summer I committed to running the race well. Pacing myself, putting first things first. But every now and then, especially when things are hard, or when I'm made more aware of my sinful nature, I wonder if the fall is inevitable. Where do you go when you don’t know if you can make it?

"And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ". – Philippians 1:6